The Long (Long LONG) Road Home (pt 2)

Recap of yesterday's post:

Hours 0-3 were spent traveling to the airport, making our way through security, narrowly avoiding an international incident, and then boarding the plane.

Now it's time for things to get tough.

Hours 4-14 (1:00pm to 11:00pm Moscow, 4:00am to 2:00pm Minnesota)

Our flight from Moscow to Washington DC began better than expected. Aleks seemed to be comfortable in his seat, and didn't mind the takeoff as much as we expected him to. He was a bit squirmy in his seat, but initially he was entertained by his toys, and giving him small food treats.

We kept expecting him to be lulled to sleep by the hum of the airplane, but he seemed to be running on a high energy level. Once we were airborne, he made a point of switching between our laps at least every 10 minutes, so that neither of us could sneak a nap in.


At one point, Aleks was curled up on Alan's lap. He was just falling asleep, when we tried to slide him over to his own seat. Unfortunately, he woke up immediately and became fussy. We expected him to calm back down fairly quickly, but it wasn't to be. Except for a short 45 minute nap at the start of the flight, Aleks stayed awake for almost the entire 10 1/2 hour flight. Which meant that so did we.

During that time, our movie choices cycled through 5 times. Although Aleks prevented a complete viewing, Alan saw parts of Iron Man 2 five different times, along with Toy Story, National Lampoon's Vacation, and Clash of the Titans.

We were very happy when our Russian flight was over. Departing the plane, we were so excited. We were back on American soil, and we had our baby with us! Despite being very tired, we proudly walked to customs, ready to declare our gift to the USA.

Hours 15-16 (11:00pm to 1:00am Moscow, 2:00pm to 4:00pm Minnesota)

As we gathered our luggage in Washington, our ears were very happy. All announcements, overheard conversations, and security instructions were in English. We'd gotten used to hearing Russian, but it was very nice to be back in familiar surroundings.

After collecting and rechecking our luggage, we moved on to the security checkpoints. The Customs agent who helped us out was very nice, and congratulated us on our successful adoption. He welcomed us to the country, along with our son. After our last experience with Russian security, it was a very pleasant change.

We stopped to grab a bite to eat at one of the airport restaurants, called our parents, and then it was off to our next flight. After seeing the number of people getting on to the flight, we inquired whether we would be able to get Aleks on early. The very b*tchy gate clerk (we could have sworn she was the aunt of the Russian security guard) told us that we could not, and we would have to move back to let the self-important Gold Flyer level people board. Welcome to America.

Hours 17-20 (2:00am to 5:00am Moscow, 5:00pm to 8:00pm Minnesota)

When we boarded, the plane was very full, and very restless. Aleks was starting to get very crabby from lack of sleep, but he could not settle down enough to fall asleep. We tried rocking him, but he wasn't having it. What started as whimpering and crying turned into full volume screaming, and we became "THOSE PARENTS".

Here, I would like to apologize to all THOSE PARENTS that I have quietly complained about over the years. I still despise those who let their kids run wild through the lanes, but to those with a screaming child that will not calm down, I apologize.

As Aleks' screaming became louder, he began coughing and wheezing as well. We finally got him asleep, but then disaster struck. The plane began taxiing away from the gate, went approximately 300 yds, then stopped. We sat without moving for about 10 minutes, and then heard the engines powering down.

"Hello ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. I wanted to give you a heads up to our situation. Apparently there is a storm front moving through parts of the US right now, that is clogging up the air lane we are about to fly. Air traffic control is telling us that they can't let us take off until traffic clears up, and they can't tell us when that will be. Based on my experience, I'd guess we'll be sitting here about an hour. Once again, my apologies."

Aleks stayed asleep through ALMOST the entire time we spent on the ground. Less than 5 minutes before the captain restarted the engines, he woke up again. This time he was very disoriented, still very tired, and managed to cry even louder.

The rest of that flight was pretty much a blur to us. Aleks was very crabby, and Kathy spent most of the flight soothing him. Alan tried to help, but the lack of sleep and stressful travel were weighing heavily on him. In addition, we were now an hour behind schedule, with only an 80 minute layover in Chicago. We had no idea if we would make our connecting flight, and we really didn't want to have to try rescheduling a later flight.

As we landed, our pilot apologized once again for the delays, and asked that anyone who did not have a connecting flight, stay in their seat. Being true American jerks, no one stayed seated. As Alan was trying to get Aleks into his Baby Bjorn, one particularly rude man pushed by. He made it a whopping 6 inches before stopping. There might have been some sympathy, except he was busy complaining to his cell phone that "the plane is late, and the taxi ride from O'Hare is going to be a pain in the ass. And there is some brat whining next to me".

I was definitely not parent of the year material on this flight, but that comment really got my blood boiling. I made sure that for the next 10 minutes, no matter where that A-hole moved, Aleks was directly behind his ear, screaming his little head off. I think I may have even crossed between aisles to follow the jerk.

Hours 20-23 (5:00am to 7:00am Moscow, 8:00pm to 10:00pm Minnesota)

As we departed the plane, we tried to find where our connecting flight was located. Of course, it was in a different concourse from where we landed. We had about 25 minutes before takeoff, so we took off through the halls.

Aleks seemed to sense the frustration and exhaustion, as he became quiet and smiley once he was off the plane. Dragging our carry-ons, we rushed through O'Hare as quickly as we could. When we arrived at our gate, we were safe. It turned out that about half the flight was connecting from another late flight, so they would be waiting for everyone. We got seated, and called Alan's parents. We let them know that we had made our connecting flight, so we would be able to see those people who came to greet us at the airport.

Surprisingly, the Chicago to Minneapolis flight was extremely uneventful. Aleks was awake but quiet, Alan was able to catch his breath, and Kathy was just happy to be a mom. The flight was a short one, and soon we had landed at MSP.

Leaving the plane, the enormity of the situation began to hit us. After 5 months of paperwork, medical exams, fees, itineraries, trains, planes, and cramped little white buses, our journey was complete. We were parents to an amazing little boy, and we were ready to begin our life at home.



And so ended our second trip to Russia. We were gone 22 days, and our return trip took ~23 hours. I am very happy to say that no matter how stressful it got, Aleks makes every day worth it.

Trip 2, Day 22: The Long (Long LONG) Road Home (pt 1)

Wednesday, August 11th:

Our final day in Moscow and Russia dawned bright and (comparatively) cool. The temperature was a frigid 65 degrees, quite a difference from the 90+ highs we had experienced almost every day of our 3 week trip. We were up early, making sure that everything was packed, and that we would be ready to leave when our driver arrived.

Hour 0 (9:00am Moscow time, 12:00am Minnesota time)
With our bags packed, we depart from the Novy Arbat apartment. Our flight doesn't leave for about 4 hours, but fear of traffic or airport snarls are a driving factor. Aleks curls up with mommy, and is able to sleep for about 30 minutes of the hour long ride to the airport. As we pull up to Domodedovo, we thank our driver for the services he has provided, and in we go.

Sadly, there was a tragedy at Domodedovo today (1/24/10). A suicide bomber got into the arrivals area and set off a bomb. We hope that by the time Aleks is an adult, people have gotten smarter about getting along with each other.


Hour 1 (10:00am Moscow, 1:00am Minnesota)

We attempt to find our check in gate, and are shocked at how disorganized DME airport appears. Rather than having a wide wall of check in gates (like US airports), or even segregated terminal areas (like Sheremetyevo), DME seems to have tossed out a handful of salt, and build gates wherever the salt landed. Lines seem to criss cross each other, some gates are hidden behind others, and the directional signs don't bother to show any of the airline logos. Finally after searching around, we found the entrance to the United Airlines queue.

The queue stretched a long way, curving its way through the terminal. As we were waiting, Alan turned himself so that the agents working the gates could see he was carrying a child in a sling. We had heard that Russian airports will usually pull families with children into an express lane. Sure enough, soon we were being asked to go to the first class lane, so we could be checked in.

Leading up to this moment, we had been worried about our seating arrangements on the flight. We hadn't been allowed to book our seats ahead of time, either on our original travel date (13th) or the current one. We were ready to complain if we were separated, but we need not worry. Our seats were upgraded for free to the Economy Plus section for all segments of our flight. Score!

Hour 2 (11:00am Moscow, 2:00am Minnesota)

After checking our baggage, we proceeded upstairs to another, unsecured lobby area. Here we noticed that our favorite restaurant from St. Petersburg, had a cafeteria style restaurant. We decided to stop, eat, and feed Aleks. Eating was a bit challenging, as Aleks was being very curious and grabbing at anything he could get his hands on. We didn't have any type of booster seat, so one of us would eat, while the other held and entertained Aleks.

Once we were done eating, we moved towards the security check in lanes. This was where our Moscow experience got a bit ugly. The lines were moving very slowly, so Alan again tried to "accidentally" get the attention of the security gate attendants. Over and over, we saw other families with larger children being pulled out of line, and brought through the VIP security section. Finally, after pulling people out of line far behind us, the woman signaled for us to come through with about 5 other families. Unfortunately, by the time we were pulled out, the single line at VIP was almost as long as the regular line.

Patiently, we waited in the VIP line. There were two gates open in front of us, so the line was making progress. When we were nearly to the front, the same woman who had pulled us aside began splitting the line into two separate lines. We ended up in the right side lane. The family in front of us was waved forward, and began their process. Once they were finished, one of the 2 people in the security area left the office, and walked away. We waited to be signaled forward by the remaining person, but she just worked on some paperwork for a few minutes.

Finally, Alan decided to step forward. She signaled and said Nyet, then shushed us back to the line. Meanwhile, many of the people behind us began moving over to form the original single line. Finally, the woman got up, left the gate, and went into the other gate to start working with the woman there. We waited to be signaled over into that lane, but the security guards just pretended there was no one over there.

Alan's patience was near zero by that point, so when it was time for the next person to step up, he walked in front of the family in the other line. They appeared insulted, but by that point going to the end of the line would have added another 30 minutes to the wait time. The security guard for this lane looked annoyed, but took the paperwork and started processing it.

After processing both Kathy and Alan's paperwork, she started working on Aleks' paperwork. She curtly began speaking in Russian to us, apparently asking for some additional paperwork. With a large sigh and roll of her eyes, she said "yellow envelope. You need yellow envelope". Apparently our US passports hadn't been reason enough to consider using her English skills immediately.

Attempting to figure out what she meant, Alan remembered the manilla envelope we had been given the previous day at the embassy. He pulled out the folder, and handed it to the guard. As she took the envelope, she promptly began the process of tearing it open, at which point Alan started yelling out "Nyet, NYET!". This was the information we were supposed to hand over to the American Customs crew unopened.

Tempers flared, and an international incident appeared imminent as Alan tried to explain that she couldn't open the document. The guard was also very flustered, and began yelling at us "No yellow, no baby!" A kind (or impatient) flier in line behind us offered to translate, and was able to get information from the guard. It turned out she was asking for a completely different set of paperwork.

Kathy understood what paperwork she was asking for, and got it out. However, rather than look at the paperwork, the guard began yelling at the rest of the people in line, and they started filing out, back the way we had come in. We stood waiting as she walked off with them, and she led them to a line in the normal security area. She made her way back to us, and very rudely yelled "come, come American". She stomped off as we tried to follow with our carry on luggage, Aleks' diaper bag, and our 11 month old son.

As we made it to the normal security area, the woman began yelling loudly at the person working there, pointing to us frequently. Eventually she threw her hands in the air, and started stomping away further into the airport. The new guard shrugged, handed us our paperwork, and signaled for us to go through the gates. All we could think was "What the (heck)?"

Our final security stop was in the bag check area. We snaked our way through the line, and guess who was now working bag check? Yup, our favorite Security guard. She glared at us, and Alan glared back as we went through the area. They had full body scanners for everyone to go through, so Alan went through with Aleks strapped to his chest. It did not take long for him to go through, so Alan figures they might not have run the machine with the baby in there.

Hour 4 (1:00pm Moscow, 4:00am Minnesota)

Finally, we were through. All that was left was getting to our gate. At least, while we were in Russia. At the gate, we were disappointed to see that the area was completely full. With no place to sit, Alan leaned against the wall with our baggage while Kathy walked around with Aleks for a short time. When it came time to board the plane, parents with small children were invited on before anyone else, even the first class passengers. So we were able to get Aleks on the plane and in his seat, before anyone else. We were very nervous about how he would do flying, but we had already gone beyond the point of no return.

Today's post went long, so I'll return to the trip home tomorrow. I promise. I'll start working on it tonight, I swear.

Trip 2, Days 19-21: Smog, Moscow Medical & an Embassy

Quick Note: I apologize for the very long waits in between these posts. As the realities of parental life have kicked in, it gets harder and harder to say "hey, I'm going to write a blog". Just one more after this one, and then Kathy can take over doing some of the post-Russia updates. Alan


Sunday, August 8th


As mentioned in the previous blog entry, Moscow was extremely smoggy and hot when we arrived. Hundreds of wildfires were raging in the Russian countryside, which covered Moscow in a thick, thick haze. We took a picture from our Novy Arbat apartment window in June (shown on left). We had the same apartment for our last few days of the trip, so we took another picture.



The second photo was taken on Monday, after the smog had cleared considerably. At one point Sunday, we could not see anything beyond the large building on the left side!

Unfortunately, this put a major damper on any sightseeing plans we had. We decided that staying healthy was much more important than getting pictures of Aleks in front of St. Basil's cathedral. We limited ourselves to a visit to one of the restaurants for lunch, and then purchasing groceries for our final stay.

We also discovered that the AC unit located in the bedroom could keep the bedroom comfortable, but only if the door was kept closed. If we tried to cool the entire apartment, it was only slightly less miserable than without. We chose to keep the bedroom comfortable.


Aleks didn't seem to mind the heat at all. He loved crawling around everywhere in just a diaper. We didn't feel like the best parents, but it kept him cooler. We focused on keeping everyone hydrated, and keeping him entertained.


The first day, Aleks was entertained by the toys we had brought. However, he soon grew bored of them, and his attention shifted. One of his favorite activities was crawling over to the side of the stove, and looking at his reflection in the steel.

After feeding Aleks, and preparing a quick meal for ourselves, we turned in early that night. Staying in the sauna (aka living room) was just too uncomfortable.

Monday, August 9th

Monday morning, Kathy asked if Alan would be okay watching Aleks while she ventured out to the grocery store for more water and Diet Coke. Aleks had been doing great so far, so Alan agreed without any reservations. By the time Kathy returned 40 minutes later, Alan was a nervous wreck!

Aleks' calm demeanor had lasted for about 5 minutes after his mommy left. At that point, he decided he was sick of daddy, and wanted mommy. So he cried. And cried. And cried some more. We learned just how loud our little guy could be when he is upset, and it is definitely LOUD. Toss in a very inexperienced new dad, and it made for a frazzling time.

Our agenda for the day was busy but quick. Our first stop was to get Aleks' visa photos. Tanya, our translator, met us outside, along with a new driver we hadn't met before. He wasn't as friendly as Ilya or Constantin had been, and didn't seem to be too happy working with Tanya either. As we drove to the photo center, he drove very fast and recklessly (even for Moscow standards).

How anyone ever does business in Moscow is a mystery to us. I'll go into detail of our path to get Aleks' visa photos.

We took a side street, another side street, and then stopped at a giant gate that was mostly closed. There weren't any signs on the gate, but we walked through to a large courtyard. After a few turns, we approached what looked like a cellar door in one of the buildings. There was a sign next to the door that said photo, but that was it. We opened the door, and descended into the basement of the building. Down empty hallways we walked, with nothing to indicate that we were going to the right place, except for Tanya's confidence. Finally we reached what looked like an apartment door. We walked in, and Comic Book Guy's Russian cousin was sitting at a desk in front of a very old looking PC. There were lots of tourism-style posters on the walls that were very faded, like they had been exposed to the sun for years and years. However, this room (and the guy working in it) looked like they hadn't seen sunlight since they ventured to Mordor to toss the ring into Mt. Doom.

After the photos were taken and printed, our next stop was at a medical clinic. Before we could take Aleks out of the country, he needed to have a checkup performed by an approved doctor.

At the clinic, there was another American couple getting their child checked also. They were much calmer about the process, as they had already adopted two other children from Russia. While we waited for their checkup to complete, Alan and Tanya filled out the paperwork required for the embassy. While there were a lot of forms to fill out, Tanya knew exactly what to fill out, and how.

We were very happy with our visit to the doctor. We had been told earlier that he spoke English, but his cheerful demeanor was a pleasant surprise. He did a variety of tests on Aleks, explaining to us what he was doing and why. He was joking with us, and entertaining Aleks, through the whole procedure. He seemed to be very pleased with the number of teeth Aleks had, as it showed that he was receiving good nutrition at the baby home.

During the examination, the doctor's assistant was typing up the report needed for the embassy. Even with waiting for the other couple's visit, we were finished at the doctor's office much quicker than we had anticipated. This turned out to be a very good thing.

Our final stop for the day was the embassy. Tanya needed to drop off our paperwork, so that we could get an appointment for the next day. We were not allowed to go with, so we waited in the car with our driver. His car did not have air conditioning (of course), so we had two choices: Sit in the back seat of a small vehicle with a squirmy, bored 11 month old, or Stand outside in the heat and smog. Eventually, heat and smog won out.

After what seemed like a very long wait, Tanya returned. Because of the weather, the embassy had been turning people away, telling them to come back tomorrow. Tanya had to explain our situation, and beg for our paperwork to be accepted. Otherwise, we would have been stuck in Moscow for at least 1 more day beyond our planned departure date.

I want to stop here, and just show my appreciation for the work that our Russian coordinators performed. Although there were some surprise changes that took place, the amount of work and care that they put into our adoption was very special to us.

After the photos, medical, and embassy visit #1, we were dropped off back at our apartment. There was still plenty of the day left, but once again the heat and smog prevented us from venturing out farther than the grocery store.

Tuesday, August 10th

This was our last day in Moscow (and Russia), and it was bittersweet. Although we were excited to be finally going home, we loved spending 3 weeks on the other side of the world.

When we went down to the street to meet Tanya that day, we were happy to see that the smog was finally starting to lift. In addition, the temperatures were a little cooler than they had been before (I believe it only got to 85 that day). Since we were only a 10 minute walk from the US embassy, we felt a bit silly having a driver take there. However, that was part of our daily fee, so we accepted the service.

Once we arrived at the embassy, we were on our own. We approached the secured area, and proceeded through multiple checkpoints. Alan was a bit surprised, as all of the outside security guards, and some internal security guards, were Russian. We always thought that since it was "American soil", that meant that all employees were also American.

Once inside, we were required to surrender our cellphone. We walked through massive, empty hallways and proceeded to window #4. Although the instructions had implied that there would be long lines of people at windows 1-3 and 5-6, there was no one in line at any of those windows. Eventually, we moved to another waiting area, that was filled with 5-6 American families who were adopting. Aleks crawled back and forth through the room, while we waited for our turn to approach the counter. Once there, we spoke with a very nice man who checked our information, and finalized Aleks' adoption papers. We received a large manilla folder, that contained all of the information needed at American customs. He was very adamant that we do NOT open this folder, as doing so would greatly slow down the process.

We were also instructed to wait in the lobby until everyone was processed. There was additional information we would be getting. This was where we got our first real surprising news of the trip. As the embassy representative was speaking, he mentioned something we had not heard before.

As a male citizen of the Russian Federation, Aleks is required to perform 3 years of service in the Russian military. This obviously cannot be enforced while he is living in the United States, but it could be if he returned to Russia between the ages of 18 and 35. The exception to this would be for him to visit the Russian embassy in the US and formally rescind his citizenship before traveling to Russia. We cannot perform this action for him, so it would have to occur after he 18. This was important for us to know, as we had always assumed we would visit Russia with him at some point in the future. If he's underage, we're safe. But if we visit after he's an adult, there could be trouble.

After that, the rest of the information was fairly standard. We gathered up Aleks, and left the embassy. We returned to our apartment, and had a celebration. Both the Russian and US governments had cleared (almost) all hurdles to finalizing the adoption!!!

That night, the heat finally broke. Around 10pm, a thunderstorm blew through Moscow, cooling the air and cleaning the skies. It was a "go figure" moment. We'd just experienced 3 weeks of record breaking temperatures, and on our last day it was going to become comfortable. Oh well.

Next up:
The final post of the trip! The Long (long long LONG) road home.